New Sensation

Back when I was a teenager, I had no chance keeping up with the latest fashions of my peers. There was no financial means to. It was far less expensive to wear clothes that looked like they were decades old instead of new, and not in the “what’s-old-is-new” cyclical style of the times.

Until I could really afford to get closer in sync by choosing, and paying for, many pieces of my own clothes, did I finally shake that feeling of not doing the best to be presentable. Some of that stuff, I truly don’t think even came around again to being a thing again, like corduroys, except in very careful combinations.

The combinations never appealed to me, so why should I expect it to attract positive attention from those I wished to attract. The funny thing is, it wasn’t so much that they were particularly loud. There was no clashing colors or flooding pants, or out-of-place loafers. It was the blandness of it all. I felt like I wore an invisibility suit during high school. Only those who shared my geeky interests, those similarly cloaked, my small group of fellow geeks, ever noticed me or were friendly. I suppose I was luckier than I felt at the time.

I’m not ungrateful, despite the above. I still struggle a bit with that feeling of never being quite sure about my look each day, but I am able to mitigate it a bit by, partly, leaving the recommendation decisions in the hands of somebody with a bit more creativity in that area than myself. Only in wild dreams did I think a stylist would be something I’d use, but there has been results, better than my own failed attempts. Yeah, a balanced wardrobe isn’t 99% t-shirts. I was so disappointed, until I got compliments instead of silence.

Fashion’s still a puzzle to me, but I’m more hopeful now that I don’t feel so invisible these days. I can also be a bit more focused on making intellectual connections, with a bit of the ice broken. I’m far less worried about it all now, decades later.

Was this a bit of a ramble? I’m sure it’s a bit shallow.

New Sensation